I’m thinking of that quote that says something like, “there is a very fine line between inspiration and looking like a gigantic idiot, so what the heck, leap.” (more or less)

This is how I mother, apparently, so perhaps I should track down the actual quote and memorize it.

For example:

Just this morning, as I was putting lunch together for Millie, I had her grab a juice box. There were a bunch of Apple & Eve mini juice boxes on the floor that have Sesame Street characters on them. She got one but hesitated before handing it to me.

“I don’t like these ones very much.”

“Why, Mills?”

No answer.

“You don’t like the “berry” flavor? It’s too small?”

“People laugh at me when I drink it.”

AH, HA! THE TRUTH COMES OUT!

*** Now all you mothers out there will know that this kind of thing STINKS! Nobody likes being laughed at, this is a universal truth, but far worse, is someone laughing at your child.****

“Who laughs at you?”

“Nic.” (name slightly changed to protect the innocent)

“What does he say?”

“He doesn’t like Burt and Ernie.”

***So now what do you do? Moms, back me up here, what? ***

Here is what I did:

“Give me the juice box, honey.”

She hands it to me.

I take out a sharpie and do this:

and this:

(It reads, “Nic, We are cool!”)

“Millie, see if he notices the mustaches and show him that Ernie and Bert are saying, “we’re cool!” and then when you come home you can tell me if he is surprised and what he says!”

Her face lights up and then she says,

“I have an idea for what we can do tomorrow!”

“What?”

“SUNGLASSES!”

I just love Millie’s little heart!

What a kid!

And Nic, even though I want to kick your teeth in (just a little bit) I know you are God’s son, and as his son I am going to give you a chance. And who knows? Maybe this will all turn out awesome?!

At the very least, tomorrow Bert and Ernie will be sporting shades!

Suckaz!